HUMP DAY HUMOUR

THINGS THAT DONT BELONG TOGETHER:

HAPPY MONDAY

"Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday". Noelle, Age 7 (participant in a survey of 4-8 year olds asked to define love)

My Weekend....

Makeup is a girl's best friend......

I ordered some makeup from E.L.F. and it came in the mail today!!! I probably didn't really need it since i have WAY too much makeup already, but i just can pass up a smoking deal. I got all of this stuff for about $15 including shipping.




The Aftermath

Another thing that came in the mail was something i won from an online blog giveaway. I saw on one of the east valley tribune blogs that they were giving away perfume, so i thought, what the heck, ill sign up, since i NEVER win anything EVER. But, today my free perfume came in the mail, and i never even was told i won. I love getting packages in the mail. Two in one day is even better.



My Cute Dog

The other day we came home to find my dogs collar, like this: He had CHEWED IT OFF!!! I don't know how he managed to do it, but it was pretty hilarious.

WELKER WISDOME

“Fall down seven times, get up eight.”
Dogen

My Latest Project.....

I started scrapbooking 3 or 4 months ago, and made a bunch of pages....But, lately I haven't been in the mood to do a whole 12"x12" page, so I decided to try doing other creative projects. Here's my first attempt at something besides a scrapbook page:

I made this journal for my sister Cassie for her Birthday. I've seen people make albums/journals similar to this, so I thought I'd give it a try.

HUMP DAY HUMOUR

HUSBAND/BOYFRIEND EDITION:

Random Thoughts on Man and Woman Relationships

HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
MEMORY
Any married man should forget his mistakes, there's no use in two people remembering the same thing.
APPEARANCE
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

HIS AND HERS ROAD TRIP

HERS
1. Pulls off at wrong exit.
2. Opens window.
3. Asks directions of a knowledgeable police officer.
4. Arrives at destination presently.

HIS
1. Pulls off at wrong exit absolutely positive it's the correct one.
2. Drives five miles into wilderness, still thinks he's right.
3. Drives an extra five miles just in case.
4. Finally rolls down window.
5. Hocks a loogie.
6. Pulls up to a 7-Eleven.
7. Gets three hot dogs, a large Slurpee and beef jerky.
8. Asks foreigner behind counter how to get back onto the highway.
9. Gets back into car.
10. Farts, after he closes the door.
11. Laughs at the idea of looking at a map as he pulls away from the 7-Eleven.

12. Drives down a dirt road with no street lights insisting this is the way back because the pimply 17-year-old 7-Eleven cashier said it was.
13. Almost hits a deer.
14. Curses the night.
15. Curses you.
16. Curses the large Slurpee.
17. Stops by the side of the road.
18 Takes a leak.
19. Still taking a leak.
20. Almost done...I think.
21. Returns to car.
22. Drives and fiddles with radio.
23. Yells at you for suggesting the map again.
24. Admits he didn't want to go to Thanksgiving at your sister's anyway.
25. He hates your sister, ever since she called him a pernicious weasel.
26. He had to look up pernicious.
27. Couldn't find a dictionary.
28. Finally found a dictionary.
29. Couldn't spell pernicious.
30. Seethes at the memory of it all.
31. But she is laughing inside.
32. And of course you're still lost.

DREADED OCTOBER 10TH

Tomorrow is going to be a stressful day for me, and mostly for DEVIN. It could be a really good day, or a REALLY BAD day. Here's why:

Tomorrow Devin's going to court to fight his red light running ticket. He didn't get the ticket from a cop though. He got it from one of those stupid red light cameras. The one on Dobson/Southern is one of the worst ones.

There's always a long line of cars turning left onto Southern from Dobson, and you enter the intersection have plenty of time to turn, but then the person in front of you stops, while your already in the middle of the intersection and have to keep going through, and then you get flashed by the camera.

I thought this picture was quite funny, since Devin's a school bus driver right now. When you have a CDL drivers license, you can't go to defensive driving school to avoid having the ticket ding your insurance.

But, the biggest thing happening tomorrow, is finding out whether or not Devin is accepted to Nursing School yet.

He's been on a waiting list for quite a while, and they're supposed to be placing people from the waiting list into schools with room tomorrow.

The waiting list is REALLY long still though, and there are still a LOT of people ahead of him on the list, so Devin & I are both really nervous waiting to see what happens tomorrow.

P.S. my friend Chrissy created a blog, and finally has started posting, so check out her AWESOME BLOG.....

http://cepearson.blogspot.com/

Welker Wisdome

"Whenever I hear, 'It can't be done,' I know I'm close to success." -Michael Flatley

"It is possible to give without loving, but it is impossible to love without giving". -Richard Braunstein

SO EMBARRASSING.

So, I was originally gonna post more random funny pictures I found online, BUT, this edition is going to be a hilarious picture that has to do with ME.

You remember the nightmare of suddenly realizing your naked at work/school? Well, today, I pretty much had that nightmare come true.

I was sitting at work, when a lady I work with came up to me and said, "Kim, do you know you have a rip in your pants?" Confused, I felt around, and realized I had a HUGE rip in the butt of my jeans, all the way along the line of the left back pocket. I was SOOOOOO horrified.

I immediately drove home and changed my pants. And I wondered how many people
saw anything before the lady at my work so nicely informed me of it. AND, it wasn't a little rip that was easy to cover up as I walked out to my car. I could barely hold my pants seams together to cover up my butt.
Then, later, one of the managers I work with told me he saw my butt flash. The only time i walked by him was when i walked into the room where ALL the managers were meeting. IT WAS VERY EMBARRASSING, and I'll NEVER be able to live it down the rest of the time I work the same place.

And WHYYYY am I sharing this embarrassing story with the whole blogger world? I guess I'm crazy. Or, maybe someone who reads this has had something embarrassing happen to them as well, and will think they're less of a loser now.

SO, if you HAVE had something seriously embarrassing happen to you before, PLEASE share to make me feel like less of a lower. THANKS.

WHAT IM UP TO....

WHAT I'M READING....

I read this book in elementary school/junior high(don't exactly remember), and it was one of my favorite books. I thought it would be fun to re-read it, since I know I could finish it in a couple hours, and I get REALLY DISCOURAGED reading a book thats really long because i get interrupted too often, and end up quitting the book when i'm halfway through. It was really interesting reading this book again, from an adult perspective instead of a kids perspective.

THE WEBSITE I'M SURFING....

Some of you have already heard of this makeup, and bought some, but if you havent, gone to this website before, go to Eyeslipsface.com! Almost ALL their makeup is only a dollar! And it isn't sample size either. If use the coupon code CAROLINA you will get 50% off of $15 of your order. It's a pretty smoking deal. I've seen other people's blogs about this makeup, but hadn't checked it out yet, but today i did, and there's seriously good stuff for only a dollar. Thanks Allison for posting pictures of your makeup. I had to go buy some. :) The price makes it seem almost to good to be true, but it isn't.

WHAT I'M EATING....

Devin & I discovered a great new place to eat the other day, and now I'm ADDICTED! It's not the closest place to drive for me, but i STILL find myself wanting to go there quite often. It's called QDOBA Mexican Grill. Its very similar to CHIPOTLE, only better. And for those of you who don't have Chipotle's in your area, there are quite a lot of QDOBA restaurants throughout the U.S., so there is probably one close by. So far,there are only a couple in Arizona, but I have a feeling they will be building a lot more of them soon. Find the QDOBA nearest you:

WHAT I'M WATCHING ON T.V.:

MONDAY

So far so good.
This season is starting off a little slowly, but it's still got my attention.

TUESDAY

This show is hilarious. I love watching the "beauties" and "geeks" be forced to learn things out of their comfort zone. This is another one of those shows that is like a train wreck that you cant help but keep watching.

WEDNESDAY

I love watching the new set of girls make a fool of themselves, and talk about how their going to be on the cover of vogue, when we all know none of the past season winners have gone anywhere. I also love trying to figure out who the winner will be. I haven't been able to figure out the winner yet this year. Usually I figure it out by now, but this year is a little more tricky.

SHOW I WISH I WAS WATCHING:

I always see previews for this show, and MEAN to watch it every time a new season starts, but I always forget, or another show is always on the same day/time. Last Tuesday, I was ready to watch it, and the show was about to start, when EXACTLY at 8pm, my stinking power went out! So,I guess I'm just not meant to watch it.

SHOW I'M ANXIOUS FOR THE RETURN OF:

I used to wonder what all the hype was about "LOST" and I finally broke down and rented the past seasons.I just finished watching the 3rd season of LOST online, so no I'm completely caught up for the next season to start. But, it isnt starting till I think JANUARY!!! I want it to start now, cause i REALLY want to find out what happens next.

SHOW I TRIED AND DONT CARE FOR:

GOSSIP GIRL

Welker Wisdome

"The real hero is always a hero by mistake; he dreams of being an honest coward like everybody else." -Umberto Eco

A friend is someone who gives you total freedom to be yourself-and especially to feel, or not feel. Whatever you happen to be feeling at any moment is fine with them. That's what real love amounts to - letting a person be what he really is. - Jim Morrison